Ever set a goal to change a habit and find the first few days effortless? But feel stuck again a couple of weeks in when your excitement and hope abandon you?
If this is a familiar pattern for you try asking yourself these *three questions*:
*Are you absolutely willing to feeling uncomfortable?*
Commit to discomfort. So fun, right? But this can’t be avoided. Think about taking a break from drinking. You have to relearn how to destress from the day without a drink, answer your friends’ questions about why you aren’t drinking, and forgo the concentrated dopamine hit you get from a glass of wine in favor of the much smaller hit you get from a club soda with lime. All of these little moments, small choice points where you are deciding to teach your brain a new pattern instead of running on autopilot, are uncomfortable. You have to be willing to let it be uncomfortable if you are going to come out on the other side. The good news is that discomfort is harmless and by no means an emergency.
*Is your reason to change truly compelling?*
I’m talking feel it in your core, tether you to the earth compelling. If not, when you’re faced with a day full of the aforementioned discomforts, it’s a lot harder to stay the course. Having a compelling reason won’t do the work for you, but it will give you that extra bit of motivation you need for the climb. If your compelling reason is to never feel hungover again that might work for a little bit. But after a couple of weeks of feeling good, it might lose its luster. Digging deeper and asking yourself why you don’t want to be hungover might yield something more compelling – because your kids are only little once and you want to be present with them. Keep in mind that your compelling reason may change over time as you change.
*Are you choosing curiosity?*
How do you react when you drink off-plan? Do you shame yourself? Blow it off? If so, you’re missing out on the wealth of information your choice has to offer – what excuse you believed, how you were feeling, what cues were present. Paying attention to all of that will make you stronger going forward, so get curious instead of judgmental. Same goes for using will power to stave off a craving. If you’re bracing against the urge it’s hard to learn from it. Get curious about what is happening at that moment. Looking at it won’t force you to give in to the craving. Instead, it will help you really understand your habit.
If you’re feeling stuck and would like some help diving into one of these three areas, clink this link to book a FREE consult with me and I’ll help you out.